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Thursday, February 2, 2012

Eight years


Eight years of marriage.

We had dinner at home with the children. Eight is a lucky number. It signifies abundance. I do feel very lucky and we have so much abundance in our lives.

I thought it would be fitting to take inspiration from Chinese New Year, so we had a Chinese inspired dinner.

Dumplings, spring rolls and a whole bream, fried in the wok. I have never handled a whole fish and it was quite confronting for me. We gave that fish so much respect and appreciation for giving it's life so that we could eat our dinner.

If you are interested, you can read my vegetarian journey over here.

But, I digress.

It was a wonderful evening. We ended up talking till midnight. We could have talked for longer, but we did have to get up the next day!

We spoke about our "creation story". Every couple has it. You know the one where someone asks you, "So how did you two meet?"

And you give the same story over and over again.

Ours has always been:

"We met in accounting class, how romantic, ha ha!"

I challenged us on this story. I said that we had to give more meaning to the beginning of our relationship than that.

So we went back 14 years. And unwound the creation of this amazing, soulful relationship that we have. The relationship that pushes both of us to be better people.

All.
The.
Time.

We realised that we have not stopped growing since we have been together. Something is always happening. From family dramas, to weddings, babies being born, family members passing away, moving countries, it just keeps coming.

We also realised that there have been a few blockages in our relationship. Some things we need to heal. Some things we didn't even know we had to heal.

This is the benefit of age and hindsight. You can look at things with a fresh perspective.

And make new choices.

I am so happy that I get to go to sleep with my soul mate every night. We work damn hard on this relationship of ours. And it is paying us such dividends.

Marriage is hard work. It is a constant reinvention.

I feel that the test of a relationship is whether that person makes you more of who you are. And whether that person makes you a better person.

I encourage you to talk about your creation story with your partner. You will gain fresh insights. 

Some things are hard to look at. But, we have been given them to deal with. 

Which means that we are able to deal with them.

Blessings to my husband.

And blessings to you.
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